2 posts tagged “traditional”

I've been struggling for weeks whether or not to write this blog, but honestly, no harm no foul.

For the past 4 or 5 years or so, I looked forward to "tournament season". Working on a kata to near perfection and making people sweat at the thought of being in the same division, being faster in "tag" (point sparring), and displaying that size is, in fact, not an advantage when it comes to fighting and all of the kudos etc that go along with competing.

For some reason, this year, I just don't care.

I am smack in the middle of planning a wedding, I'm a shodan now, which means, it's an "x" man race to third of fourth place, behind all of the third and fourth degrees in my division (luckily, Picklez and Latino Heat are getting old and will be moving up in a year or two O-: --yea, I went there), and my focus as far as karate goes is on making sure other students are doing their best. I am so totally unmotivated about competition, that it's sickening to me. Pressure has nothing to do with it; I don't feel any, but I don't have the "killer instinct" that (I think) I'm known for. I even seriously suggested purposely dropping my weapon, for the sake of not having to do the kata. Fight training is not as fun as it was in the past, nor is it a priority to me. I don't know if it's the wedding, the rank, being burnt out at the thought of competing, knowing I'm out matched or what, but if it's down to waking up @ 5am to train or sleeping in, I'm sleeping in.

This lack of motivation isn't across the board in terms of training, I'm very motivated by testing in January, and even more so than normal because Overboard and I will be Mr. and Mrs. Hangtime, and she's aiming to be ready to test then too. I just can't put my finger on it. Maybe it's that my focus is on the wedding, and in September, I'm going to want to hit the ground running for November (Dothan), but I can't say...I just don't know.

Fighting Knockdown in July is not going to happen, and fighting Semi is just not as...sexy...to me any more --> am I going to fight Semi, who knows; am I seriously going to train for it, nope. No desire to.

In closing, I guess this was just to get it off of my chest. Overboard and I have talked about it before; I think she finds it kind of odd too. She shrugged it off, but I could kinda tell by the look on her face she found it weird. I guess we'll see what happens September 1...after the honeymoon.

-HT

No, I'm not making some veiled reference to Overboard; we're just fine and will continue to be.

As most of you know, I achieved the rank of Shodan this year (read: I got my black belt); I used this year as a "comfort" year (save Superfights; I was out to win). I think it's time to end the honeymoon.

"But Hangtime, you've only had your black belt since May."
I'm aware, but truth be told, why should that matter? I walked into our dojo's Traditional Tournament this year with the mindset of "I'm just here to get that first time (as a black belt) out of the way; no expectations". I don't do anything without expectation; everything has a goal.

"Gee Hangtime, this is all a little random..."
Maybe it is, just a touch. While on the way home, I popped in my training CD, and I was reminded of a mindset I haven't had in quite awhile...July 28th, as a matter of fact. There has been a slight lack of desire to be the best, and when I say slight lack, I mean total absence. I can't have that. I've never been that way; complacency is not in my vocabulary.

Back to the Traditional: Picklez and I were placed in a very strange situation this year --we had to compete against each other. Throw in Latino Heat, and well, I automatically assumed I can do no better than 3rd. Why should I assume automatic 3rd or worse? Don't get me wrong Picklez and Heat are phenomenal Martial Artists, no matter how much Picklez may deny it. Let's face it (and I'm sure they know it too), they were competing against each other. No way was a "day one" Shodan going to run with a Shihan-dai and a Senpai. Don't get me wrong, I mean no disrespect, I'm just simply throwing my hat in the ring for next year to make it a competition for them. :-)

Be Solely!
Hangtime